When she loves me

I know when she loves me more than other days. I can see it in her eyes. Her smile on such days is different. She holds my hand, she sits close by. Even when working on her projects she makes sure we share the same space.

She would laugh at the most silliest dad jokes I make.

Our children think she pretends to love my sense of humor but I know for sure, she is my number one fan.

She says my sense of humor is what keeps our marriage lively. I believe her :)

I don’t ask her for much favors anymore. If anything, I try my best to be of service to her.

That’s my way of saying, “ I appreciate you.”

I know she loves flowers, stationary, tea sets and cake. Oh! over the years her taste in chocolate has changed as well. I tease her, that these aristocratic tastes aren’t healthy for our marriage.

And don’t even get me started about her book craze.

I often contemplate whether she really reads them all.

She says,” I don’t buy brand handbags or shoes or diamonds honey, I invest in knowledge”.

Well there you go, she wins the argument.

We started out shy, timid and hesitant with delicate egos.

Often hurt and misunderstood we have spent days and nights cooking plots to show the other one who is right.

Eventually our favorite peace line has become

“ I see your point of view, yes we both make a strong case , I will go with you on this one. ”

It took 16 years to get here.

But I am happy to have greyed my hair with her.

When she loves me, she sings, laughs out louder and heartier.

Her tea is stronger and sweeter.

She would listen to my stories, baby me and tuck me goodnight.

Strange as it may sound, but when she loves me, I understand myself better. I become her confidant, care taker, best friend, cheer leader, her best half.

I have a favorite line during our spousal disagreements,

“ I don’t think we are on the same page”, to which she calmly replies,

“ the book is same, it’s ok that you are a few chapters behind 😉 , you will catch up, don’t worry. “

I love her wittiness. It keeps me going.

She has been patient with me, over the years. Though she thinks I am the more patient one ( when she loves me more!)

I often steal glances of her when she prays, even with the eyes closed she knows, she then loudly says

“ Ya Wudud, Ya Haleem , bless my dearest husband with best of both the worlds, he has been kind to me, please be kind to him, amen”

She doesn’t know, I make dua for her in every tahjud, every salah, whenever it rains, whenever we travel, whenever I can ...

“ ya Rab bestow us with Your mercy. Forgive our short comings. Remove any misunderstanding or arrogance from our hearts. Ya Fattah open our hearts to love each other with the best of intentions and make us among Your beloveds.

Ya Jabbar heal us from our spousal discords, allow us to be honorable in each other’s eyes.

Ya Allah make us the coolness of each other’s hearts and eyes.

And ya Allah please increase our Rizq tayyab as I would need to make a library soon, ameen 🤲🏼”

When she loves me , my duas become stronger, more powerful and my heart most content. Alhamdulilallah Ya Kareem, Ya Wahab. Alhamdulilallah.

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As Irambintsafia I must admit, I have done not much service to my mother, Safia.Instead, she as my parent, has served me ( which I will never be able to repay) for all my years on earth. I am not sha